How do you get over unrequited love? Can I even get over it? How do I get over such love? Obviously, those are not rhetorical questions and if these are questions you ask yourself. Then I need not guess what you are going through right now.
I know how you feel, I’ve once been in such a relationship. But for those who don’t understand what unrequited love means, it simply means a one-sided love that is not openly reciprocated or understood as such by the person you love. This person may be aloof of the admirer’s deep and strong romantic affection, may consciously reject it. So, how do you get over this kind of love?
Why do you want a romantic relationship with that person to begin with?
When it comes to getting over unrequited love, it is important to quickly determine your reasons for wanting to be in a relationship with such a person in the first place. Even though you don’t want to accept it, the main reason why you don’t want to leave that person is that you are scared of being alone. How do you really value yourself? A lot of people in such relationships are in it because you feel are not important unless you are in a relationship. Then, figure out the relationship you have with yourself. If you can figure this out, it will be easy to make some decisions and of course, let go.
Acknowledge the fact that you are heartbroken.
Breaking news, there is no way to get pass rejections. You have to accept that. Yes, it hurts, and sure, your heart has been broken. Coming with a broken heart is the real pain that comes with it. According to research, the emotional wound is an emotional pain that feels the same as we feel when we are physically injured. This same research shows that emotional pain activates that same part of your brain as physical pain. So, how do you get past this? Acknowledge the fact that you are heartbroken, and you need to take care of yourself. You need to forgive yourself for that, you are human after all.
Pick yourself up again.
You’d heard a lot of love therapist and professionals talk about picking yourself up again after a rejection or break up. Yes, I understand the fact that this seems to be easier said than done. But believe me, this is one way to ease off the sadness, and get over unrequited love once and for all. Go out there, meet up with new people. This will really show you if you need the person in the first place or its just the craving to have something you will never or couldn’t have. Meeting new people gives you that chance to meet up with people who will reciprocate the love and make you feel important too. And yes, this may take a while, but trust me, it’s worth every sacrifice
We’ve all experienced this at some point
One of the easiest ways to get over this is to understand that you are not alone. We’ve all been there before. Just because you were dumped or heartbroken doesn’t mean you are less man. The truth is, at some point in our lives, we’ve suffered from unrequited love. The painful thing about this sort of rejection is that it doesn’t just leave you feeling sad. You feel broken and lonely like there is something really wrong with you. At the end of it all, just move on, its life and there is nothing you can do about that.
Seems like a familiar place to you?
A lot of people don’t realize that its possible to set oneself up for rejection or a familiar pattern. Some people experienced trauma as a child and end up being or feeling rejected. And this terrible experience is gotten from people who you supposedly love. This experience tends to shape one’s relationships. This would obviously lead to you subconsciously loving someone who would later reject you, does that sound familiar to you? At this point, you need to sincerely ask yourself if you’ve fallen for someone who has rejected you in the past. Look closely, is there a pattern here? If yes, you’ll need to take care of this as soon as possible. The best way to solve this is to assess how important that person is to you. The moment you start to do a self-reflection, that would lead to the beginning of your true healing.
Understand yourself better
You will need to get acquainted with your two sides, both the good part and the bad part. Ad apart from knowing yourself, you will need to start knowing people differently, realize that people are three-dimensionally. The problem with people who experience unrequited love is because they usually see the people they love in a perfect form, which is wrong, they are humans like you. The moment you start seeing the faults of someone (not in a judgmental way) and their strength, this will make you stay grounded.
Love yourself and your capacity to love others
So, you want to move on. The best way to do this is to accept yourself and your vulnerabilities. You should also be happy and bold enough to love someone else. Like a friend of mine would say, I’d rather love again and be heartbroken than not to love at all. Even though I’m not saying you should jump into a relationship like its nothing. You need to learn to trust people and accept them for who they are. Yes, loving someone who doesn’t love you can leave you feeling sad and not wanting to love again, that won’t solve it, go out there and have fun.
These are some of the ways to get over unrequited love and move on, giving someone else the chance to truly love you for who you are.